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May 22, 2025

Salute to Maidens

(dear readers, thanks for kindly indulging a shout-out. We celebrate a granddaughter’s graduation and commissioning tomorrow, May 23, 2025, at the U.S. Naval Academy, Annapolis. Well done, “amazing” Grace.)

Social media was abuzz a while back as myriads of accolades found their way to devices of all kinds, lavishing praise upon a host of individuals – daughters, wives, mothers, sisters, grandmothers. A nonstop flow of celebration spotlighted this distinctive sector of humanity occupying our planet.

Women.*

Which prompted me to reflect on a select list (not exhaustive by any means) of ladies who’ve especially affected my life from “back when”. The exercise gave rise to awakened feelings of gratitude.

*My country-girl mother, Thelma Christine Bay Lout, riding urban buses day after day across the busy metropolis of Tulsa, just to sit for hours at my bedside. Prayers accompanied her presence through those three months of my residency in Hillcrest Hospital’s Polio Ward. When specialists voiced no assurance that my paralyzed legs might ever again bear up my body’s weight, mom weathered the prognosis. Loving me. Interceding for me.

*The evening eighteen-year-old Alice Ann Barnes – sitting next to me beneath a Billings, Montana street lamp – pondered my request as I timidly asked her to become my wife. The marriage proposal included a fine-print detail I felt I should in fairness share, “You and I would likely be living overseas. Probably Africa.”

Ann Smiled (a positive sign?). Then responded,

“When I was nine-years-old I told my parents I was going to grow up and be a missionary in Africa”.

Ann’s ‘yes’ resulted in some daring moves. Leaving her Big Sky country, venturing to live in Oklahoma, Texas, then New York. Afterwards, it was Kenya and Tanzania. Our first child (Julie), then our second (Scott), and finally our thirdborn (Amy), each drew in their first baby breaths in a delivery room of Nairobi Hospital. In time – decades later – Ann would work as a Registered Nurse in a large medical center back again in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

The facility’s name rang a bell. Hillcrest Hospital, whose original facility (same location), had once served as a place of shelter and care for the uniquely ill. Children and youth besieged by a virus called poliomyelitis.

*She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. (The Proverbs Woman, Prov. 31:25)

May 15, 2025May 15, 2025

Interior Design

“Jerry, when are you going to stop apologizing for who you are not?”

My periodic coffee meetups with Dave had tooled along for a couple years’ when he delivered the gut-punch question. Straightforward as he was, I had not met with such terse language from my esteemed life coach friend. Now moving into my seventh decade of life on Planet Earth, the months going forward would witness to the truth that Dave’s provocative challenge came at a good moment.

Like many people afflicted with the self-questionings common to classic naval gazers, I had grown fairly adept at masking my personal insecurities. Being a person with something of a quick wit, I could without realizing it employ a periodic splash of comedic humor, which could in turn detract from my inbuilt fear of failure. Lighthearted levity, I would afterward see, can serve as a handy denial mechanism.

A curiosity stirred inside me about the Panera Bread friend seated across our table. What was it about Dave that got himself out of bed each morning? What fueled his relentless desire to help men – a lot of men by now – to move into life’s slow lane and think reflectively? Many of us gents, I came to realize could gain a thing or two from doses of down-to-earth wisdom.

Among the special toolbox instruments wielded by this retired airline industry professional was the tool of helping me uncover a short list of fundamental things that make me tick. For a good while I had carried an unspoken yearning to understand what it was that had been making me get out of bed each morning!

Your One Degree, states the website blurb, is a personalized, coach driven program helping you discover and implement your unique God-given Design.*

Dave’s question that day over coffee blew open a window, making way for a breeze of revelation to waft in. I had been much aware in a general sense that I, like all image-bearers, had been created on purpose, yes by design. These sessions with Dave Jewitt and the thing he had dubbed “Your One Degree” had been wakening a truth in me. I am invited to quite intentionally cooperate with the Divine in unleashing (even at this senior age) still further elements of life-giving juices. All this in the company of and under the administration of the Spirit. God’s truth-anchored Spirit.

I am now pretty much done apologizing for the person I am not.

Gems of life-shifting perspectives can emerge in varying kinds of settings. It seems that – amidst them at least – God carries a fondness for coffee shops.

May 8, 2025May 7, 2025

Promising Prospect

Those surprise happenings that all of a sudden spring up in our lives. Such a moment came when Ann and I learned that our nephew Todd and his wife Karena were selected as backup singers for Andy Williams in his popular Branson show.

As special as this was, we grew happier still when word came of the debut of a blockbuster theatrical production in the same family-friendly entertainment center. Branson, Missouri nestles along the shores of Table Rock Lake in the glorious Ozark Mountains

Learning that Todd and Karena would be portraying a range of varying characters in scenes of The Promise – a robust contemporary musical depicting Jesus’ life – we reached out to some T.U. students for a special kind of road trip.

During one of these excursions as our van negotiated the scenic landscapes of Ozark Country, a young man – a father-to-be – broached the subjects of conscience and of faith. Mr. Ming displayed an intensity of emotion.

The child had been conceived at an inconvenient time. Their discussions over the unplanned pregnancy found the couple grappling over the pros and cons of a probable impending “procedure”.

Later on, after taking in The Promise production – a beautifully choreographed musical – and afterwards enjoying a nice chat with my “celebrity” nephew and niece, our group boarded the van for our return to Tulsa. Along the highway route, the earlier conversation resumed.

Mr. Ming, leaned forward from his place behind the driver’s seat, volleying question after question on the value and possible dignity of life. We spoke of the precious worth of each created person. Our back-and-forth dialogue ignited still more questions. Scripture was brought into play.

Through the days that followed Mr and Mrs. Ming and their unsettled minds were privately presented to heaven by believing friends.

Weeks passed. Months rolled by. Weighing their options in view of a freshly illumined conscience the couple made their call. And, when into the family circle the new little one entered the young parents pressed forward with deeper assurance than ever into their own infancy pilgrimage. Trust in God – author and guardian of life – was their new North Star.

May 2, 2025

Fun Night

“It’s Friday, so tonight I’m off to the Fun Mosque!”

“Fun Mosque?”

Throughout my years I had never considered these words as linked. Would not have thought of the pair as a compatible couple. Now, here was my friend and ministry colleague, Terry – a knowing smile lighting his face – more than happy to address my puzzled expression.

“Yeah”, he chuckled, “I’ve taken to calling it that.”

“You probably know the place”, he went on, “the little mosque a few miles out where this group of nominal Muslims from (he mentioned a country) meet up every week. I’m friend to several of the guys. We have a fun time visiting over any number of things, including culture and faith. . . or no faith.”

My friendship with Terry got its’ launch in 2007 at a Panera Bread on 41^st Street. He and his wife had served for years in the Middle East – responding to Jesus’ call to “make disciples of all nations”. Both are fluent in Arabic. Now – after a long, difficult but fruitful season overseas – they had settled back in Tulsa. Hearing of our campus work, Terry phoned. We arranged a meetup over coffee. He soon joined the staff. Our friend-and-co-worker relationship grew rich and deep over the years.

“Most of my ‘Fun-Mosque friends’”, Terry was now explaining, “have little use for religion of any kind.” He continued,

“Witnessing firsthand the heavy-handed way their country’s leaders have for years tried to impose their brand of Islam on the citizens it. . . well, it’s turned them off.” Terry sipped his coffee.

“Still, most all these guys are quite welcoming of new friends. They’re warm and engaging. They bring out food as we carry on visiting, joking, laughing, and sharing stories.

“And we talk serious things as well”, Terry went on after a pause.

“Occasionally, I get asked a question by one or two of the fun mosque guys about my faith. When that happens, I tend to share more about Jesus than about ‘Christianity’ as a formalized religion. This is a favorite time of the week for me, no question – sitting cross-legged there on the floor sipping hot tea with them,

“Fun.”

April 24, 2025May 22, 2025

Family Ties

There is no surprise more magical than the surprise of being loved. It is God’s finger on man’s shoulder.

The reflection attributed to Playwright Charles Morgan, brings a soul-warming smile this day.

I was not smiling those several weeks back at Christmastime upon learning my twenty-seven-year-old grandson was being wheeled off to surgery. T.J. would soon be left without a colon. The culprit – advanced Crohn’s Disease.

The procedure complete, T.J.’s body then faced a string of bewildering, daunting and very worrisome hurdles. The hospital’s I.C.U., his new address. Seven weeks into the journey, T.J. and his (rock star companion) wife Ashley are breathing a bit more easily. This week’s physician report thankfully signals a turn for the better.*

The expressions of love directed toward T.J. and to our whole family certainly did not come as a full surprise. Many readers of this column can relate.

A number of those praying and caring supporters cheering us on are people already near and dear in our lives. Still, the parade of well-wishers, friends and acquaintances, shoring up our feeble faith through their voices and their unrelenting praying seemed at times super-human. Indeed , the Divine element is irrefutable – his strong presence.

Our brother-in-Christ and past co-laborer Pastor Wangombe in Africa – adds his voice to many of our international student friends, past and present, “It is war; and in all these things we are more than conquerors through Christ our Lord”.

South Asia friend, Raj, chimes in, “Amen, rock on TJ and team. PTL”!

Smiles, indeed.

*further update: T.J. is out of hospital. With family, gaining strength

April 17, 2025April 17, 2025

Primed and Ready

Scene ONE: “I’m sorry, Ann, can I please ask a favor of you?”

The South Asian scholar, Bao, had become a brand new father and his wife and baby boy were set to be released from hospital. They needed help. “My academic advisor is just now assigning me extra duties and this is keeping me from getting my family back home to our apartment.”

“Sure”, Ann replied, “just give me the information and I will be there.”

Scene TWO: A year or two passes. Our phone rings.

“Hi Ann, are you very busy this afternoon. . . my wife and baby; they are at the hospital. .” (Déjà vu was in the air).

Such calls can readily spring out of the blue for campus workers in service to international students. My wife adjusted some things and, in each instance, headed to the medical facility. A mother herself – (now grandmother) – a smile visited her face as she navigated city traffic.

Her professional training – first as LPN, afterward as Registered Nurse – had simply reinforced Ann’s natural bent. Wired for responding to people (friend or stranger) in time of need, my wife was once the focus of a family chat around our family dining table, I posed a question to our children,

“So kids, which of these five qualities would you say most hits the mark as your mother’s ‘primary love language’. . Physical touch – Quality time – Gift giving – Acts of service – Words of affirmation.

“Their response was immediate and unanimous – each of them chiming, “Acts of Service!”

In an earlier season a couple decades prior when our home rested atop a remote hill at an Africa mission station, Ann launched into action one night to speedily fashion a makeshift bandage from a set of bedsheets. A young man brought to our screened back door had been laid open at the hand of an angry, inebriated fellow tribesman. The downward swing of the attacker’s machete left a grotesque open gash. Ann’s stop-gap measure (bad pun) met with success.

“To the servant of God, every place is the right place, and every time is the right time”*

April 3, 2025April 2, 2025

Seasons Rhythms

Nothing comes to Spring save through Winter.

Since the long-ago decade when I first snagged this anonymous quote (sketching it there in the flyleaf of my Bible) its wisdom has revisited me often. On my better days I’ve paid attention.

Over coffee a friend and I puzzled, “Would it be possible for us humans to appreciate and honestly savor the good of life without drinking of the hard – the ‘difficult’ – of life?”

Winter preceeding Spring. As a pre-toddler I met with an episode of Polio that left me with a forever limp. This was followed by yet another tangle with the same nasty virus shortly before I celebrated my tenth birthday. This encounter nearly ended my life.

In the case of both these afflictions, Spring emerged, a Springtime of thankfulness. Even now a smile of gratitude visits my eyes and face.

A winter of wanderings as a stubborn, self-willed teen somehow gave way to sunshine’s warmth in the form of generously forgiving parents and persistent, rescuing Lord. Exodus 34:6 puts it well, “the Lord, merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love”

When an esteemed institution misconstrues motives and stridently calls into question a team member’s integrity. Winter

When self-reflection, prayer, and straightforward dialogue seasoned with grace characterize engagement with whatever ‘powers that be’. Spring.

And on the personal front. Where long Wintry seasons of remorse, fed by insecurities from mistakes and general brokenness, dog the soul. To such a dreary scene, what an unspeakable relief comes when one awakes one morning to the drenching of the sunlight of grace through an East window.

When Spring begins to dawn, signaling Winter’s soon retreat, no one needs declare it to us. The gray cold must yield.

It is time.

March 27, 2025March 26, 2025

Fresh Lens

“Take Perspectives – it will ruin you for the ordinary!”

By the time Floyd McClung, author of ‘The Father Heart of God’, heralded the Perspectives challenge he and his wife Sally had for years lived an ‘Indiana Jones’ kind of existence. Their ground-breaking disciple-making ventures in Youth With A Mission in Kabul, Afghanistan and in the heart of Amsterdam’s red-light district yielded abundant fruit in radically changed lives.

My first learning of the fifteen-week ‘Perspectives on the World Christian Movement’ course came at the corner of our city’s Third and Zunis avenues. Outreach Pastor John McVay of Tulsa Christian Fellowship – a flagship church for missions in Tulsa – “accosted me” outside my office door.

“Hey Jerry, you might be interested in doing this course – three hours on Monday nights for the Spring months. You and fellow students will take in top-notch presentations on insights featuring cross-cultural outreach. And, you’re likely to get a deeper-than-ever picture of Biblical, historical, cultural and strategic Perspectives on reaching out to the world and making disciples.”

I showed up for my first class, and was soon “ruined for the ordinary”.

Perspectives struck such a chord that I afterward offered a confession to my friend, John. “Although I served in Africa missions for twenty years, a part of me feels like I have never been a missionary!” While the stark comment wasn’t far from the truth, rather than it leaving me bummed, the course fired me up more than ever for the ‘Great Commission’ enterprise.

Over time the Perspective’s series – compelling in both spirit and substance – has stretched its boundaries to regions across the world. A number of our ministry staff and volunteer teams gave themselves to the rigorous and rewarding task of plowing through those fifteen weeks.

Indeed, one of our busy student leaders ended up facilitating the full program himself in the heart of our campus. He and his wife afterward relocated their young family, at no small expense, to the heart of a major American metropolis far from their neighborhood roots. Immersing themselves in the language and culture of this “foreign ethnicity” has since been yielding spiritual and relational dividends. This young family, “ruined” by the seeking-and-saving nature of God’s lovingkindness, go about their daily lives fueled by a substance referenced by a writer long ago.

The love of Christ compels us.*

March 20, 2025March 19, 2025

Common Stirrings

Once, in my early days of shadowing Jim Tracy on campus, he invited me to join him for a Sunday visit to a church on Sheridan Avenue.

Asbury Methodist’s annual event, designed to spotlight Missions awareness for the congregation should be in full swing. And the church’s outreach director, Mary Ann Smith, whom I had never met was (I would learn) more than up to the task.

Once the last ‘amen’ of worship service sounded and the twin exit doors opened wide, scores of the faithful – families, couples, singles – poured onto the repurposed parking lot.

Worshippers were soon strolling in and out of roomy little tents assembled for the occasion. They moved along, stopping now and then, taking in the several missionary displays set up and manned by a ministry rep or two. The booths featured photos and artifacts brought from other lands. Intriguing.

At Mary Ann and her team’s invitation, a collection of meal vendors had rolled in their food trucks and set up serving tables. The festive environment saw interested believers exploring “the world beyond” while munching fast food cuisine. The setting lent itself to an easy exploration of global needs, extending opportunities for connecting in Christian outreach.

Months passed when one day I sensed a nudge to reach out to Asbury Church. I hoped to see if this missions-minded community would take an interest in “the world at our doorstep”, i.e. international students of the University of Tulsa.

I met with Mary Ann Smith.

Mary Ann listened with interest as I shared our dream of better serving college students coming here to the U.S. heartland from across the world. She paused a moment before offering her thoughtful, poignant response.

“You know, Jerry, it’s interesting you’re wanting to visit with us about this just now.”

I was all ears.

“For the past little while I have been mulling the question, ‘What role could our church play if an opportunity opened for us to serve the students of T.U.?”

March 13, 2025March 14, 2025

‘Chef Mechanic

Counted among the company of specialized craftsmen who grace our world is a rare breed we might label the “Chef Mechanic”.

We know of chef. We know of mechanic. We hear at times of a chief mechanic. The soul of Chef-Mechanic Dan Sterling crossed a threshold before sunrise last Tuesday. Heaven grew richer at my friend’s passing.

We had met Dan and Maggie at a mission event months before and soon discovered the retiree couple, literally lived and breathed service. Taking early retirement from years as a diesel mechanic, Dan and his adventurous lady set about pursuing whatever fields of service they sensed the Lord opening before them. One such trail led them to a downstairs dining spot on the Tulsa University campus. Our ministry’s FIL (Free International Lunch).

Donning his kitchen apron he was set for whatever culinary tasks lay before him. Flashing his ear-to-ear smile, Dan’s call of, “OK, gang, shall we!” rallied his half dozen fellow volunteers to enthusiastic action.

Moments later the area buzzed with the clinking and clanging of pots and pans blended with a chorus of happy voices. ISM’s international luncheon prep team.

A predominant presence of talented ladies – full-time homemakers and career women (all navigating busy schedules) – offered their collective skills, preparing and serving meals for the scores of students filing along cafeteria-style serving-line.

The Thursday morning atmosphere there in the basement kitchen of the Wesley was often punctuated by a robust burst of laughter offered up through a cheery male voice. Dan’s was a contagious laugh.

Our primary aim for the weekly lunch was to bring forward under God’s enabling a nourishing and tasty “filling” experience for each student passing along the serving table – our hospitality turf, our basement bistro. What joy witnessing the Sterling Team (Maggie and son Matthew often equally engaged) happily, generously doing their part. Pleasing palates, enriching souls.